Drudge runs photo caption contest : Lone Star Times

Drudge runs photo caption contest

by Matt Bramanti · 10/31/2005 12:24 pm

New York Times columnistette Maureen Dowd was quite pissy and lonely this weekend, as evidenced by her 5,000-word essay lamenting the fact that women are picking femininity over feminism. You know how emotional broads can be.

Matt Drudge, of flashy police light fame, responds with a MoDo caption contest. I’m stealing it and posting it here:

"You know what they say about guys with big feet…"

Leave your suggestions in the comments. Also, feel free to speculate on her cocktail of choice.

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Comments

34 Responses to “Drudge runs photo caption contest”

Robert on October 31st, 2005 at 2:06 pm

Matt,

Looking for some captions, here is my “Top Ten” list:

1) It’s Halloween, I’m a guy in drag, Ted!!!

2) Hey beefcake, what’s your sign???

3) Put that gentleman’s drink on my tab.

4) Bartender, send a drink to that stud over there for me.

5) Hey handsome, where have you been all my life??

6) Heck, I ought chugged Ted Kennedy, yesterday!!

7) I sure like the eye candy in this place.

Hey, handsome, looking for a good time!!

9) What does a girl have to wear to get noticed around here??

10) My!! What big long ears you have, you must be a Democrat!!

I hope you like these!!!!
hamous on October 31st, 2005 at 2:21 pm

Is that a banana in your pocket or are you just happy to see me!
amcmurrey on October 31st, 2005 at 2:22 pm

Hey Scooter, gimme a call when you get outta prison.
hamous on October 31st, 2005 at 2:22 pm

Second choice: Is that a banana in your pocket or are you really a man!
Smacktle on October 31st, 2005 at 2:26 pm

If only I didn’t have to talk then maybe more men would like me!
Mike Martin on October 31st, 2005 at 2:32 pm

“My biological clock is tickin’ like this, and the way this case is goin’, I ain’t never gettin’ married!”

-Lisa from“My Cousin Vinny”
shannon on October 31st, 2005 at 2:48 pm

“Best looking airhead writing for the NYT”
“Oh God, please let her keep her mouth shut”-bartender
Robert on October 31st, 2005 at 3:03 pm

Here’s some more:

1) There ain’t a guy in here that I can’t out drink!!

2) Buzz off, Bill!!! I’m a guy, you fool!!

3) Hey sweet cheeks, your moneys no good in here.

4) Bartender, have you seen my drinking buddy, Ted?

5) Man, you got muscles in all the right places!!

6) Let’s see if I can MAKE some news tonight.

7) Gosh!!! I hope I do something stupid tonight!!

Hey buddy, are you my one-nighter for tonight.

9) I sure thought I would be an easy pickup tonight.

10) Damn, I lost my book of pickup lines!!!

Try these!!!!
shannon on October 31st, 2005 at 3:03 pm

“I prefer my usual feminazi brownshirt to this damn dress”
shannon on October 31st, 2005 at 3:05 pm

“Does this dress make me look fat?”
shannon on October 31st, 2005 at 3:18 pm

“Of course the frown is permanent, I’m a liberal.”
SC on October 31st, 2005 at 3:30 pm

“My thong matches this barstool”
Matt Bramanti on October 31st, 2005 at 3:36 pm

#12: Ew. Dude.
SC on October 31st, 2005 at 3:41 pm

Sorry, momentary lapse in judgement
Mike Martin on October 31st, 2005 at 3:41 pm

“I may not be Wilma Flintstone, but I could definitely make your bed rock.”
Texan-American on October 31st, 2005 at 3:48 pm

“Howdy I’m Dowdy, but my name is Dowd”
jimb on October 31st, 2005 at 4:05 pm

#6 - off topic, but that’s gotta be one of my favorite not-so-brainy movies.

“I could use a good ass-kickin’, I’ll be very honest with ya.”
shannon on October 31st, 2005 at 4:10 pm

“Of all the gin joints in…….”
Mike Martin on October 31st, 2005 at 4:13 pm

#17,

Yeah, it cracks me up no matter how many times I see it. I have the DVD, but I have to be careful not to let my two “yoots” see (or rather hear) it.
Matt Bramanti on October 31st, 2005 at 4:14 pm

#17: “No, I think I’ll just take the money.”
shannon on October 31st, 2005 at 4:16 pm

“Damn, that Rush Limbaugh is a great nooner.”
gregg on October 31st, 2005 at 5:34 pm

Ya know, for a dyke she is almost do-able. That is, after a case of brewskies.
Mike Smith on October 31st, 2005 at 6:09 pm

Caption:
I used to be a stone cold broad…

Now I’m just stoned cold…
gregg on October 31st, 2005 at 6:22 pm

I bet shes drinking a Bloody Mary!
Big.Cat on October 31st, 2005 at 7:10 pm

Buy me another drink and I’ll “reveal my source.”
Wino on October 31st, 2005 at 7:14 pm

Judy spends time behind bars.

I spend time in front of them.
squawkbox on October 31st, 2005 at 7:17 pm

I can go from zero to bi_-h in 2.3 seconds.
squawkbox on October 31st, 2005 at 7:23 pm

She’s drinking a
Bi_-h-On-Wheels Ingredients: Gin, Dry Vermouth, White Creme de Menthe, Pernod

with a beer chaser.
gregg on October 31st, 2005 at 7:41 pm

Wonder if the carpet matches the drapes?
Mike Smith on November 1st, 2005 at 5:14 am

#29… not MY job!!!!!!! Whooof…..

{You might be amazed at the number of lines that were deleted before I posted this}
Dugger on November 1st, 2005 at 7:05 am

It’s not about the feet guys, it’s about the ankles, and it looks like she’s got some really big ones.
Jaime on November 1st, 2005 at 7:24 am

If you have to ask how much, you cannot afford me.
Sherri on November 1st, 2005 at 9:39 am

The bartender looks like he’s trying to look down the front of her dress.
Rorschach on November 2nd, 2005 at 5:07 pm

The problem is that she hasn’t found a guy willing to keep his testicles in a jar of formalin instead of between his legs as nature intended.