By a 5-4 vote, LoneStarTimes.com suggests you consider voting for Kinky Friedman for Governor.
By a 9-0 vote, LoneStarTimes.com’s contributing editors are unanimous in expressing their disgust and disappointment in Gov. Rick Perry.
The following sentiment, expressed in the course of our internal, confidential email debate does a good job of capturing the perspective of the Rick Perry supporters:
A caller to Dan yesterday put it well. He said something like “I’m angry and disgusted with Rick Perry. But I’m scared of Chris Bell.” While it pains me to say it, I believe a vote for Kinky is a vote for Bell, so I have to incredibly begrudgingly say Perry.
Man that hurts to type that. Really, really bad.
And although this next comment is neither here nor there, it is simply too funny not to share with the world:
I’m voting for Rick Perry. He has a strong signature on silent auction baseballs and he’s more clean shaven than Granny.
Heh.
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All jokes aside, our disappointment in Gov. Perry could hardly be greater.
The things he’s gotten “right” are the bare minimum that should be expected of a Republican Governor of Texas.
Pro-life? Didn’t spend as much money as fast as the Democrats would of if they had been in power? Maintained the death-penalty? Appointed conservative judges? Defended traditional marriage? Off-set a massive tax increase in one place with sorta a tax decrease somewhere else? Finally, after too-long ignoring the problem, did something to somewhat help secure the border?
Dude– these aren’t accomplishments– these are bare necessities. You don’t get “points” for this, or gratitude. That’s your damn job.
We didn’t hire you to run out and hike the ball three times before punting, all the while looking good in your uniform. You got hired to move the ball down the field and put some points on the board.
By that metric, your “leadership” has sucked.
And we’ve got zero reason to think it’s going to improve, should you win re-election.
Don’t like what you’re reading? Prove us wrong.
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Hopefully, Rick Perry won’t even get the chance. Because a majority of us have decided to take the plunge and actually cast our ballots for Kinky Friedman.
Not all of that support for Kinky can be dismissed as a mere “protest” vote against Perry.
The simple fact is that on a lot of issues Kinky is quite conservative– most notably on controlling the border, appraisal caps, the “Trans-Texas Corridor” (of which we have diverse opinions at LST), prayer in school and–broadly speaking– the “de-Wussification of Texas.”
Is he a bigger supporter of abortion than we are? Yup. Less a fan of the death penalty? True. More comfortable with gambling as a revenue stream? Sure. Blase about “gay” vs. traditional marriage? Absolutely.
Luckily, even if he wins, there will be very little a Gov. Friedman could do, by himself, about nearly all of these or any other topic.
In fact, we are prepared to guarantee you that after four years of a Kinky administration, gays will not be gambling their aborted fetuses on street-corners to bail their murdering life-partners out of jail so they can head to the local casino.
This is TEXAS, for goodness sake. If you can’t see that, you deserve to be manipulated by the direct-mail consultants of the establishment GOP.
HEY! SNAP OUT OF IT!!! Do you worship God, or Government?
Texas is not going to fall apart if Kinky is governor– it might not be “judge of the Chili cook-off” as he’s joked, but neither it is President of the United States. There is still a legislature and still a Lieutenant Governor– who, as we note elsewhere, is certainly a competent individual and would be able to provide “adult supervision” if, God forbid, a dirty-bomb were to go off in Dallas and Gov. Friedman were not able to rise to the occasion. (And we aren’t at all convinced that he wouldn’t be, for what it’s worth.)
As liberty-loving Republicans, we’ve got no problem with “average” voters witnessing the fact that Texas will not slide off its axis and disconnect from the Earth if its government isn’t run by a “professional.”
That might even be a good thing.
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Perhaps the most important reason to vote for Kinky Friedman, however, is to provide at least some hope of eventually returning the Texas Republican party to its conservative, limited-government roots.
If Rick Perry wins, the battle is already lost. Anyone who thinks that he or they will have “really gotten scared this time” and are going to “shape up and return to the grassroots base” is deluding themselves.
The only way politicians and political parties learn lessons is through pain. Not persuasion. Not pressure. Pain.
If Rick Perry wins, he and the comfortable-with-government crowd will not have learned a darn thing– other than the fact that they can manipulate you successfully. They will be laughing. At YOU. Laughing.
Rhetoric aside, it will be back to business as usual in under two weeks. And you will stomp your feet and wail and complain, and there won’t be a darn thing you can do about it. Because he’ll be the Governor. Because you returned him to power.
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.
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But what about Chris Bell? Didn’t we learn from the whole Perot/Clinton fiasco? How can we live with ourselves if by not voting for Perry we allow a declared liberal Democrat to slide into the Governor’s mansion through the backdoor?
We are very, very sympathetic to this argument. For what it is worth, our reading of the political landscape allows for a reasonable possibility that Kinky Friedman can actually win this thing, regardless of what the polls are saying.
We’re not saying it’s very likely– we’re just saying it’s feasible. The chances are certainly better than the Mainstream Media would have you believe.
But we’re not going to go into greater detail right now for fear of altering the situation and making that possibility less likely. We’ll see.
But we will say this–even if Bell were to slide in, our premise doesn’t change. Pain teaches lessons. Nothing else will. Wish it weren’t so, but it is. A Bell administration would be terribly painful. But we, and Texas, would survive it.
The comfortable-with-government crowd in the GOP establishment wouldn’t. We can promise you that, for sure.
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Ultimately, every one of us, readers included, is going to have to do a gut-check and decide whether you want to vote out of fear of what might become, or hope for what might be.
We encourage you to vote Kinky Friedman for Governor.
“Im tirtzu, ein zo agada.” If you will it, it is not a dream.