Border Secrets Revealed
by The Panda Man · 02/20/2007 11:17 amLST has obtained a photo of a secret meeting in Austin on border security. The photo reveals for the first time a new weapon for use in the fight against illegal immigration.
Texas, we give you: The Border Twinkie.
Real Twinkies wear chaps
That’s right, fellow Texans, Austin will stop the influx of drug runners, thugs, illegal aliens and others with a wall of tasty creme filling. Mmmm………creme filling. This new weapon has considerable promise, as long as the drug runners don’t get the munchies.
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FIRST AGAIN!!!!!
Words fail me…
Oh, puleeze!
I’m imagining Chuck Norris’ character (”Walker, Texas Ranger”) as a twinkie, kicking bad guys’ butts while smiling, never losing an ounce of cream filling!
Giving illegal aliens “twinkies” can do one of two things: 1) make the illegal aliens overweight and easier to catch or 2) make the illegal aliens overweight and become a burden on our medical services. Remember the government has to be “PC”, so we will have to wrap the twinkies in flour tortillas so that we are ethicly correct in treating our illegal aliens or Johnny Sutton might prosecute us for not being “PC”. Oh, the things we do to screw up our own society!!!!! “PC” will definitely be the death of us, yet!!!!
Twinkie The Kid:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=86by6m6He7A
You get a big delight in every bite….
The Ding Dong’s bring in Twinkie The Kid….
Does anyone actually know what that stuff is that you can squeeze out of a Twinkie? Is there an MSDS available for it?
There are those rumors about you-know-who being a …..twinkie.
Well, at least the twinkie idea will work better than governor goodhair’s other attempts at border security. Oh, that’s right, he hasn’t had any. My bad.
If he violates an Illegal’s “rights”, will Sutton eat him?
bigjolly, The cream filling is primarily shortening and sugar, whipped. That along with the preservatives, makes twikies almost non-biodegradable. I beleive that my high school biology teacher said something about the edible life of a twinkie is on the order of decades.
I have personal private knowledge that a twinkie made in the 60’s will still be ediable in 2060.
Sheeeee! I read it on the internet!
Hurray Twinkie man. In his little yellow cape he flys in to rescue mary jo wanna, all 800/lbs of her before she can go up in smoke, and delivers her to the capital, so Govr hair spray can claim he saved the day!
#6
IAIM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8OhQEq95b4M
#11
Duhmoose
That reminds me of the scene in Die Hard when the cop is talking about twinkies. ROFLMAO. Does this mean I can pack them in my box to send to my troop, Operation Blackhawk, in Iraq? LMAO.
emme
King Ding Dong = Rick Perry?
emme, they might be considered a biohazard.
Emme - just how hard did you have to look to find THAT!?
Alas, they do not have indefinite shelf life, only 25 days:
http://www.snopes.com/food/ingredient/twinkies.asp
#16
duhmoose
When my son was over in Iraq they had to wear their chem suits are you telling me that the troops are not protected from chemicals anymore? (tongue in cheek after that.)
And along the lines of Shannon’s comment, as the caption says, “Real Twinkies wear Chaps,” but let me add that “Real Chaps aren’t Twinkies.”