Guy wants to tell joke at his execution : Lone Star Times

Guy wants to tell joke at his execution

by Matt Bramanti · 06/04/2007 4:02 pm

Knight acknowledges there’s nothing funny about his likely execution later this month for the fatal shooting of his neighbors, Walter and Mary Werner, almost 16 years ago outside Amarillo. But to help him come up with his final statement, Knight is accepting jokes mailed to him on Texas’ death row or e-mailed to a friend who has a Web site for him. The friend then mails him the jokes.

Knight said the joke he finds the funniest will be his final statement the evening of June 26.

He said he prefers jokes that don’t have a prison or death penalty theme.

“That depresses me,” he said.

Poor guy…leave your death-row jokes in the comments.

By the way, I’d also like to point out the Chronicle’s questionable taste in linking to the condemned scumbag’s MySpace profile.

Filed Under Uncategorized ·

Comments

7 Responses to “Guy wants to tell joke at his execution”

PBFloyd on June 4th, 2007 at 4:18 pm

I guess he wouldn’t appreciate my joke about what his choice given to him by prison officials for a final meal would be: crispy, or extra-crispy!!!

Wouldn’t want a felonious, murdering, remorseless criminal to be depressed, would we?

I know, I’m not tollleeerrraaanattt enough! O:
hefitz on June 4th, 2007 at 4:28 pm

A lawyer walks into his client’s death row cell and says, “I’ve got good news, and bad news for you.”

The prisoner says, “Okay. What’s the bad news?”

“The bad news is that the Governor won’t issue a stay of your execution.”

“Oh that’s terrible. What possibly could be the good news?”

“The good news is that I got your voltage reduced!”
StacyE on June 4th, 2007 at 4:48 pm

I’m sure the victims families find the story and his sense of humor really, really hillarious. I bet they are just rolling laughing.

The whole thing is almost as unfunny as my sarcasm.
Peter on June 4th, 2007 at 5:16 pm

Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

An eternity in Hell.

——–

I think it’s funny.
trl3 on June 4th, 2007 at 5:51 pm

It would be appropriate if he wakes up at heavens gate and St. Peter tells him the joke wasn’t funny, so go to hell.
Dov on June 4th, 2007 at 7:45 pm

I bet his joke is gonna be “dead” in the water.
Wino on June 5th, 2007 at 11:42 pm

Here are some contributions for him:

“I hope those needles are sterilized.”

“You may want to up the dosage. I’ve been taking my vitamins.”

“Did I leave the water on in my cell?”

“I’m very sorry for what I did, and the pain I caused… NOT.”

“Please don’t forget to mail my voter registration card. I’m planning to start a ‘Dead Felons for Hillary’ PAC.”

I know they aren’t funny. What a jerk.