Why is there so much gender confusion in the world today?

BEIJING - A panda once believed to be male and sent to Japan to breed with a female without success gave birth to twin cubs this week, state media reported Thursday.

Whoops. Turns out that this bear babe was a bit butch.

“Jinzhu was believed to be male owing to her inconspicuous secondary sex characteristic and behavior,” the agency quoted Wei Rongping, assistant director of the reserve’s research center, as saying.

Of course, there was not a lack of trying to figure out the bear’s preferences.

Jinzhu was sent to Japan in 2000 to mate with a female, the report said.

“When the pandas showed complete disinterest, experts decided to turn to artificial insemination, leading to the discovery that Jinzhu had no penis,” it added.

Apparently no one bothered to check very closely before the mating session. These animals are in good hands, are they not? Finally, nearly ten years after the gender-bender bear was born, caretakers appear to have figured out what was going on.

It was not until 2005 that scientists discovered 9-year-old Jinzhu’s ovaries were positioned in the wrong place, and gave her a two-hour operation to make her a “normal girl,” Xinhua said. Jinzhu subsequently mated with a male in March 2007 and gave birth 142 days later, Xinhua said.

Now we have a new, if somewhat confused, panda mother, and a set of panda twins to help keep the species going. But what about the “news behind the news?” The real story here is a sad revelation of male inadequacy.

“The penis of an adult panda is only about 3 centimeters (1.2 inches) long,” which was a possible factor behind the mix-up, Xinhua quoted panda expert Li Deshen as saying.

At last we know the real reason why pandas are so reproductively challenged. Brotha bear got no game. Whatever is a woman to do?