Joshua Coleman, a San Francisco-area psychologist and author of “The Lazy Husband: How to Get Men to Do More Parenting and Housework,” said equitable sharing of housework can lead to a happier marriage and more frequent sex.
Back in a bit. I’ve got dishes to wash.
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Dear, if you want me you gotta clean the bathrooms
This has been working for years with my bride. Physcologists just now discovering this makes me question their ability.
its called bribery….politicians and wives get it….
its goes like this, Darling, when you finish with the bathrooms would you mind loading the dishwasher
I must be doing something wrong, I do all the housework and still don’t have a Lovelife.
Moosie,
All the housework? Can you cook and clean fish? Own a boat?
Simple
That’s EXACTLY the part of married life I’m trying to avoid!
My husband in all our 40 years of marriage has never cleaned the bathrooms (true story) or picked his laundry up from the floor and put it in the hamper (true story). Nevertheless, I have overlooked it all and we are happy.
Simple, I live by myself. If I don’t clean it no one does, and if it ain’t clean my parents/brother/sister/niece/nephew would never come to visit.
Vlou: That must be some pile of clothes after 40 years! I’m not going anywhere near the bathroom.
/jes funnin’ ya!
I agree with the shrink…. but it’s really simple,( not to use your name in vain,simple), a happy wife puts out more! Duh! If she works a full time job, has kids, and a house to run, she needs help. If you can afford it, hire a cleaning lady. I promise you will get more attention. If you can’t afford it, help her without her asking. If she asks, she may feel she is incapable and it makes her feel inadequate. If you see something needs done, do it!
Now for the ladies…….. if he does something and its not quite perfect to your liking….SHUT UP. He did it. He’s not going to clean like you, and he may miss a spot…… big deal!
My husband’s idea of helping clean dishes is eating all the food on his plate before he falls asleep on the couch.
/sigh
My beloved hubby was wonderful in that he worked, I worked and we had one child that he never missed a school function for and seldom missed taking her to work with him Saturdays (he only worked 2 or 3 hrs on Saturdays.
He cleaned bathrooms and always put his clothes in the hamper. I kept the kitchen clean, he might vacumn or even dust every now and then if I was busy. but that was not what really mattered. He was wonderful, loving and compasionate and a fantastic father. He did think his turn at cooking was to call Dominos Pizza and go get ice cream and toppings and cones. But he never missed a chance to ride a bike, or throw a ball with our daughter.
He remembered holidays in fact three days after his funeral I recieved flowers and a teddy bear from him for valentines day. Ordered long before his death.
Its nice that now that my daughter is grown and older than I was when I married her dad, she has all these really good memories of her father, not just as a dad, but as a role model of what a truly compasionate, loving husband can be. He set the yard stick high for her future hubby to meet, but I know she will find him out there, in Gods timing.
Man or woman, build memories. they matter much more than you could ever know
Hal ……………….. WHY?
#13 Tedtam, I feel your pain. Mine, was that way too.
The best thing about living by myself is I don’t answer to anyone. I do what I do, when I want to. I cook what I want when I want to, and if I don’t want to do the dishes that night……. I DON’T hehe. freedom
You were fortunate to have a friend like that. And I suspect that he was too.
#12, Bingo American Woman!
Keep that up and you’ll be enjoying a half pound of Bob’s home roasted coffee beans.
#17, BigJolly. Well said indeed.
Wow Bob, I’m flattered.
I think it’s my generation that is the most perplexed by ” roles”. Our grandmother’s generation, and a lot of our mom’s were housewives. My gram was immaculate, and took great pride in her home, baking, and family care. My generation went to work, for equality or sumpin, but it backfired! Now we have the guilt of not keeping perfect homes, and the stress of a job. o We managed to spend ourselves into a necessary two income environment, and with all on our plates, sex… ” oh ya, I remember sex, when I wasn’t so darn tired all the time” hehe
#14, Politically FED UP, I suspect your daughter had the benefit of two good role models.
Back when Wayne Dolchefino and Sandra Green used to have their respective morning and afternoon talk shows (I think it was KPRC, but I’m not sure), we used to all run together. Wayne had things growing in his bathroom that weren’t from this planet. Sandra wouldn’t use his bathroom.
Good rule of thumb: If you don’t like the way your spouse does some household chore, just nicely volunteer to do it yourself.
Great rule of thumb Big45. Another is, if you come home tired from work, she probably does too.
I had an agreement with a former spouse that worked pretty good. If you don’t like the way I did it then do it yourself!!!
So I learned to appreciate his help in chores whether it was done to my standard or not, and he did the same. It sure taught me to lighten up!
Unfortunately, household chores was not the cause of our marital demise…………..
#5 - LOL. I cook, clean, cut grass, do laundry, steam clean carpets, mop floors, scrub the loo, etc. But I’m no better off than you. And I’m married!
Ha, whatever. I did all the housework, cooking, yard work (on nearly six acres) and that didn’t result in any improvements in that regard. I hold a job where I travel a lot and could only do it on weekends, but that was the only way it got done. Of course I still do all of it, but divorced, and now the house is always clean and the yard is improving now that I don’t have anyone messing up what I already did. No more pigsty and I am much happier with a clean house to come home to.
Hmmm I have no advice for you guys who do the stuff and still don’t get any…..
I do. I can’t print it here though.