One example of irony:
On the same day the Dow Jones average surges nearly 400 points,
A London newspaper’s headline reads: “USA 2008: The Great Depression.”
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
Just an update on the state of modern media.
- Current free-market value of Pulitzer Prize-winning editorial cartoon by the Houston Chronicle’s Nick Anderson: $25.00
- Current free-market value of a picture of LST’s David Benzion appearing to hump an inflatable rhinoceros: $43.00
You know you want that photo. Click here to bid.
They put the yee-ha back in your storm drains:
State and local authorities today searched an east Houston company that builds engines and transmissions for evidence of alleged illegal dumping of hazardous waste.
The search of Thunderbolt Products involved members of the local environmental task force, which includes the Houston Police Department, Harris County Pollution Control, Harris County constables and Texas Parks and Wildlife, said Capt. Albert Lynch of Parks and Wildlife.
The company is suspected of dumping waste products, such as used oil and anti-freeze, directly into nearby storm drains, officials said.
“It (the waste) goes directly into the local bayous,” said Capt. Marvin Tamez, with Texas Parks and Wildlife’s environmental crimes unit.
Come on, everyone, sing along:
If your transmission’s got you down or your motor falls apart
That’s the time to come to Thunderbolt; you don’t need a brand new car!
We still believe in value and we pass it on to you
At Thunderbolt we fix it right and we guarantee it tooWe put the yee-ha back in your motor and transmission!
What a friggin’ joke these guys are:
“On April Fool’s Day, the biggest joke of all is being played on American families by Big Oil,” said Rep. Edward Markey, D-Mich., as his committee began hearing from the oil company executives.
Idiot.
Lawmakers were looking for answers to the soaring fuel costs a day after the Energy Department said the national average price of gasoline reached a record $3.29 cents a gallon and global oil prices remained above $100 a barrel although supplies of both gasoline and oil seemed to be adequate.
The answers lie in the fact that lawmakers have placed too high of a hurdle on refiners and have stopped exploration in the U.S. In favor of growing freaking corn.
Idiots.
What is it with today’s parents?
The family of a teenage girl who says she was sexually assaulted by a 19-year-old man she met on MySpace.com asked a federal appeals court Monday to revive their lawsuit against the social networking Web site.
A federal judge dismissed the $30 million suit in February 2007, rejecting the family’s claim that MySpace has a legal duty to protect its young users from sexual predators.
Guess I’m just plain tired of parents shirking their responsibilities because this crap chaps my arse. Listen up, parents of Julie Doe:
IT IS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY TO PROTECT YOUR DAUGHTER!
So, your precious little child has a filthy mouth and starts cursing around a teacher. She takes the traditional approach and washes the kid’s mouth out with soap. Gets fired. So what’s a modern parent to do? Why, sue her, what else?
A state district court jury has awarded the family of a Sims Elementary School student whose teacher was accused of forcing him to drink liquid soap $15,000 in damages in a civil suit, according to court documents.
Now the parents will be $15,000 richer and the kid has surely learned a few new curse words in the two years since the incident. What awesome parenting skills!
The award itself is a joke.
On Friday, a jury in state district court awarded $5,000 for pain and mental anguish and $10,000 for future mental anguish, the documents said.
LOL. Give me 5 grand and I’ll drink the whole bottle of soap. As for future mental anguish, yep, I lay awake at night thinking about the times my mama washed my mouth out. And thanking her for it. Is that anguish?
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