How old is John McCain?
by David Benzion · 04/18/2008 6:45 amUPDATE–Welcome NRO Campaign Spot readers!
John McCain was born on August 29th, 1936.
So here’s an idiotic lefty “attack” ad designed to spook all of us into into freaking out over how old that actually is.
Among the items mentioned, the ad notes that John McCain is older then…
- The Golden Gate Bridge
- Plutonium
- Coke in a can
- McDonalds
- Velcro
OK, smart-ass, that sword cuts both ways; here’s my list of things John McCain is older than.
- John McCain is older than betraying national security secrets on the front page of the New York Times.
- John McCain is older than the fundamental break-down of family structure among the poor.
- John McCain is older than Rev. Jeremiah Wright.
- John McCain is older than having to explain to your children why everyone on the TV is talking about the President’s penis.
- John McCain is older than the ban on lawn darts.
- John McCain is older than 9/11 Troofers.
- John McCain is older than the ACLU being taken over by radicals.
- John McCain is older than Hillary’s secretive health-care task force.
- John McCain is older than the public sphere being filled with near-pornographic advertising that is impossible to avoid.
- John McCain is older than facial moisturizers for men.
- John McCain is older than Gangsta Rap.
- John McCain is older than politicized CIA agents distorting a National Intelligence Estimate on Iran’s nuclear program because they don’t like the President’s (i.e., their boss’) policies.
- John McCain is older than Roe v. Wade.
- John McCain is older than Michael Moore.
I’m all for change and progress… but some of what’s “new” since 1936 hasn’t been an unqualified improvement, and there’s nothing wrong with preserving (or trying to recover) the good while getting rid of the bad and embracing the future.
So by all means, if the Democrats want to have a debate over what John McCain is older than, let’s have it.
I suspect a lot of folks haven’t had to wait until 2008 to finally find something about America to be proud of.
Feel free to add to the list of things John McCain is older than in comments.
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John McCain is older than crack cocaine, ecstasy, and methadone.
John McCain is not only older than Chuck Norris, he’s older than karate.
John McCain is older than the Milky Way Galaxy.
John McCain is older than the “health bars” in my desk that my wife thinks I eat instead of breakfast tacos.
John McCain is older than his mother.
What else is he older than?
John McCain is older than YOU, you little jerk!
John McCain is older than Janet Jackson’s boob.
John McCain is older than his wife’s ” family” recipes.
John McCain is older than the concept of burning corn while leaving oil in the ground.
John McCain is older than the Department of Education.
John McCain is older than “art” made up entirely of Christian symbols and excreta.
In John McCain’s day, exhaling didn’t make the weather get hot.
John McCain is older than the traitorous Jane Fonda.
John McCain is older than the looney left ruling Hollywood.
John McCain is older than dirty, smelly, pot smoking hippies.
And for a slight twist on the topic:
John McCain is old enough not to have been trusted in the latter half of the 60’s. This is a definate plus in my book.
John McCain is older than HAL.
John McCain is older than John Murtha’s earmarks.
John McCain is older than The New Deal.
In the “where it counts” category:
John McCain is older AND SMARTER than either HELLary or “BO”.
John McCain is older AND MORE EXPERIENCED than either HELLary or “BO”.
John McCain is older AND MORE QUALIFIED than either HELLary or “BO”.
John McCain is older than Global Warming AND Global Cooling.
John McCain is older than House members flying to another state to avoid voting on a bill.
John McCain is younger than light rail, but older than paying over $1 billion for a few miles of it.
#10: Nice one, Bob!
John McCain is so old he was born when Moby was a minnow.
John McCain is so old he was born when the Dead Sea was just getting sick.
Actually the ACLU was FOUNDED by a bunch of communist radicals in 1917, so that is actually false.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ACLU
Everything else in the list however is true.
Helen Keller was a communist??? I did not know that.
# 18 hamous
Actually, I believe that she considered herself a socialist, not that most of the posters here would know the diff…
The difference is sort of like being a “little” pregnant.
I’m willing to cut Helen Keller some slack.
Not a lot, mind you; just some.
So no Helen Keller jokes?
Yeah, I think we can pass on that today.
So I guess I should not say that she just couldn’t see how capitalism was clearly superior to other forms of society?
That is correct; your argument in favor of free-markets would have fallen on deaf ears.
Damn you, Rorschach. Damn you to Hell.
Ok, I won’t say that then. =D
John McCain is not only older than Plutonium, he is older than:
Neptunium, Americium, Curium, Berkelium, Californium, Einsteinium, Fermium, Mendelvium, and Nobelium too.
John McCain is all natural. The elements above are synthetic.
John McClain is older than my mother’s underwear and fits me just as poorly.
John McCain is older than the Warsaw Ghetto Uprising.
John McCain is older than Operation Barbarossa.
John McCain is older than the Sexual Revolution.
John McCain is older than Mick Jagger.
John McCain is older than most Weapons of Mass Destruction.
John McCain is older than the Interstate Highway System.
John McCain is older than unleaded gasoline.
John McCain is older than the Liquid Fueled Rocket.
John McCain is older than the Nuclear Reactor.
John McCain is older than “paper or plastic?”
John McCain is older than the internet
John McCain is older than ENIAC
John McCain is older than OPEC
John McCain is older than Israel
John McCain is older than Yugoslavia
John McCain is older than Exxon-Mobil
John McCain is older than Chevron-Texaco
John McCain is older than the BATF
John McCain is older than the IRS
John McCain is older than the DHHS
John McCain is older than the Department of Education
John McCain is older than Social Security
John McCain is older than the CIA
John McCain is older than the USAF
John McCain is older than NASA
Mick Jagger looks older
Tell me four alarm, do you rear your mothers underwear regularly or just on special occasions?
I’m sorry, that’s “wear”.
John McCain remembers when it was legal to own fully Automatic Weapons and sawed off shotguns.
#35 - I’ve noticed some guys loved their mothers so much they’ve taken to wearing the heirlooms in their ears. Must not have as much fondness for the gal as I passed on the brazier, too, judging the bloomers to be more discreet.
John McCain is older than the NSA.
OK for some reason, by the time I reached #38 I have been laughing so hard I am crying. y’all are a funny bunch! How can you wear panties in your ears? I need a PICCCCCCCCCCCc and Rorschach y’all with the Helen Keller stuff……. still rolling.
John McCain is older than waterboarding.
John McCain is so old, only women had pierced ears and only men had tattoos.
actually poster ‘rear’ was funny.
Benzion’s brilliance recognized by Jim Geraghty at National Review Online. Impressive, and Jim adds some of his own to the list.
http://campaignspot.nationalreview.com/post/?q=MWM4ZDg1NzZmMGU2MWMxN2M2YTc3ODNlMTVlOTkxYjA=
John McCain is older than:
John Roberts
David Souter
Clarence Thomas
Steven Breyer
Samuel Alito
John McCain is (roughly) the same age as:
Antonin Scalia
Anthony Kennedy
John McCain is younger than:
John Paul Stevens
Ruth Bader Ginsberg
John McCain is older than the A-bomb.
John McCain is older than the Nuremburg trials.
John McCain is older than Auschwitz.
John McCain is older than McCathyism.
John McCain is older than the Great Society.
John McCain is younger than Liberal Fascism the practice.
John McCain is older than Liberal Fascism the book.
John McCain is younger than liberals betraying America.
John McCain is younger than Julius and Ethel Rosenberg.
John McCain is older than the Soviet Hydrogen Bomb.
John McCain is older than Warren Court deviations from the Constitution.
John McCain in younger than the actual Constitution.
John McCain is older than the Black Panthers.
John McCain is younger than the NAACP.
John McCain is older than banning dodgeball.
John McCain is older than banning tag.
John McCain is younger than the NRA (National Rifle Association)
John McCain is younger than the NRA (Natioanal Recovery Administration — but just barely!)
John McCain is older than the two-term limits for presidents.
John McCain is older than federal grants for busybodies.
John McCain is older than liberals running to Canada to avoid serving their country.
John McCain is older than Kenya as an independent nation.
John McCain is older than communist and racialist economic advice to the Kenyan government by B.H. Obama (senior).
John McCain is older than the Weather Underground.
John McCain is older than the academic tradition of hiring terrorists for the faculty of major state universities.
John McCain is older than:
scrotal inflation
Ward Churchill
Roe v Wade and 40 million abortions
John McCain is older than Clinton lies.
And older than the newer ones Obama tells, too:
http://hotair.com/archives/2008/04/18/video-new-gold-standard-set-in-obamas-shameless-distortion-of-mccains-comments/
AW I’m crying with you…I’m not sure if it was the panties or Chuck Norris that had me laughing harder…what is a good joke without Chuck Norris I ask you!!
John McCain is older than the Man Boy Love Association.
John McCain is older than natural male enhancement.
John McCain is older than plumbing licensing tests in Spanish.
John McCain is older than gay and lesbian studies.
John McCain is older than mandatory sensitivity training.
John McCain is older that airport and courthouse security searches.
John McCain is older than having about 50% of the children in the country subject to court orders.
John McCain is older than New Coke
John McCain is older than disco
John McCain is older than taking prayer and God out of schools
All “change” is NOT good
And to anyone who says McCain is not “their” guy, I say, “What did you do to elect anyone else (give lots of money, time, etc.) in the primaries”? If nothing, then shut up and vote McCain because he is infinitely better than HilLIEry or Barrack Hussein Obama.
Well yes I did thank-you very much. So do I have your permission to SKIP THE BOX?
What have YOU done to get McCain to address his obvious non-Republican votes, non-conservative positions? What have you done to notify Mr. McCain that he is ignoring a rather large block of voters and that he might be doing this to the detriment of his campaign?
Nothing?
I did not think so.
Last I checked my first amendment rights are not predicated on who I support or whether I support anyone at all. Oh and don’t even think about telling me I forfeit my right to gripe if I do not vote for the prez. That is a false premise, one gives up their right to speak if they do not vote, nope I don’t see that any where in the Bill of Rights.